Far too wasted to blog . . .

so I will leave you with these.

\

More fabulous pictures to come from the happiest place on earth.  Now off to the hot tub to soak my feet.  Ay yi yi.

We are off to . . .

Catch you later! :)

Dustyn. . .

You are intelligent, strong willed and patient. A peaceful lifestyle and helping others is very important to you. You’re not a take charge kind of guy and sometimes rely too much on your feelings when you make decisions, but you always mean well and try
your best to do what’s right.

Take the Quiz and Share Your Results!

Flitch Creative

Thanks to my fabulous uncle Matt at Flitch Creative we got our pass-along cards done.  I know, we are slackers!  We have only been talking about them for months.  But we finally got around to getting them done!  And they look great!  Thanks Matt.  (if you have any designing/printing needs, Flitch Creative would be the place to go!  They rock.)

I have got quite a few address from my fabulous readers, but if you are interested in helping spread the word that we are adopting, drop me a line with your address and I will get them sent out to you!  dustynkamieATgmailDOTcom

Thank you so much for all your love and support during this adoption process.  We couldn't do it without you!  

Did you know I had a 7 year old niece?

Yep, that's right!  Today little Miss CamRee is 7 years old!

Here are seven facts about her:

~She is little miss smarty pants!  I can't believe how smart she is!  She is LOVING first grade and is teaching herself cursive.  She can read SO well.  Better than a lot of high schoolers I know.  :)

~She LOVES High School Musical.  She has a HSM room.  She wants to marry Troy.  (I'm just teasing you CamRee.  She says she "hates" Troy.  But we all know better.

~She is so creative and artistic.  And has been since an early age.  I am sure this has nothing to do with being her mother's child.

~She was my very first niece.  I am pretty sure she got spoiled to death by me so I could make sure I was her favorite but she was too young to remember it.  But of course, I am still her favorite Aunt.  Right CamRee?  ;)

~She LOVES to play games.  And is always begging us to play games with her.  Most days we play, but when we don't it's a sad day.

~She has a very soft/tender heart.  She hates when she has to leave Grandma and Grandpa's.  (Because I am there.  :D)   She is a sweet girl.

~She is the happiest, smiliest girl I know!  She can always make me smile no matter what.  Most days I just want to take her home and keep her.  And sometimes she considers it because I let her make cookies... but then she remembers that she misses Hadi, so she decides to go home.  Oh yeah, and her mom is cooler than me.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAMREE!!

Lost.

I hate it when I lose something important.  Something that means everything to me.  

I know I have mentioned it before, but I lost all the pictures that we took the day that Hannah was born.  (The hospital gave us a disposable camera)   I honestly don't think I have seen them for years.  I have no idea where to look.  I have looked everywhere time and time again.  But still, they are lost.

Tonight, I suddenly had the urgency to find them!  I must find them tonight.  That is all that I have thought about all day (and well...  for the past 3.5+ years).  All day I imagined looking for the photos and finding them and writing a nice post with a new picture of my beautiful daughter to post with it.  A picture of our little family together.  Maybe heal my heart a little.

I can't find them.

I have searched all the places that I have searched a million times and they still aren't there.  (There aren't many places to search in our house).  I would stay up all night looking, if I knew where to look.

It always makes me completely sick.  Physically sick.  How could I possibly lose the only pictures of my daughter?  (We still have the ones the hospital took, thankfully)  I mean really, where could they have gone?  Did we leave them at our previous house?  Should I go knock on the door and ask?  Can I really go another year without finding them?  After 4 years, I thought we would find them.  I need to find them.

With or without pictures...  

Happy Angel Day my baby.  I love you so much.  I can't wait to be with you again. 

I thought this year would be easier.  I thought after 4 years my heart has begun to heal.  I know we will be with her again and I know she is with all of our many loved ones that have passed on.  How can I be sad?  And here I sit bawling like a baby because I can't find my pictures.   

I can't believe it's been 4 years.

Pass-along cards? Anyone? Anyone?

Do you ever have a hard time titling your post?  I do.

Well...  our pass-along cards are done! YAY!  I know most of you are thinking that it is about time we finally got on that.  I mean after all, it's only been two years!  I know!  Anyways, I'd love to share some with you!  If you want a few (when we get them... we don't actually have them yet.  But soon.  If you happen to be taking a trip to St. George soon, let me know!) email me your address and I will send you a few!  dustynkamieATgmailDOTcom   I am so excited to see them! Yipee!  THANK YOU UNCLE MATT!  Oh, and incase you missed it or forgot, we need your pass-along cards!  We have an adoption board hanging in Dustyn's classroom.  I am also going to take some to the local hospital and women's shelter.  So feel free to email me and I will send you my address.

Anyways... on to my day.  It was a pretty good one!  My dad text me and asked me if I wanted to attend a funeral with him.  Of course I said yes.  It was the funeral of his cousin's husband.  It really was a great funeral.  I am so glad I went.  Kent was a great man!  I didn't know him well and only saw him occasionally around the holidays.  But I learned a lot about him today.  He really lived a good life.  He was a great man who was loved by many!

During the funeral there were so many great things that were said.  But since this week brings the 4th year anniversary of losing our Hannah, there was one thing that stuck in my mind.  They were talking about life and how there are 3 stages.  Kind of like a 3 act play.  (President Packer has talked about this before)  We are currently in the 2nd act.  When we leave the 1st act and come into the 2nd act (this mortal existence) there are so many people that are happy to see us and to be a part of our lives.  It is the same way when we leave this life.  We may feel sad, but there are so many more people on the other side that are happy to see our loved ones, just as it was when we arrived on earth.  It makes me happy to think about all my many wonderful relatives that have passed on that are taking care of my baby.  She is there with so many dear people.  My grandfather, Dustyn's father, Dustyn's sister, and many, many great grandparents... just to name a few.  How can we be sad about that?  She is with people we love who love her dearly.  What a blessed plan our Heavenly Father created.  He loves us so much.  I am so thankful of the knowledge that I have of the Plan of Salvation!  I am so excited to be reunited with my dear family members who have passed on.  And even meet a few that I never had the opportunity to know.  What a happy day!  (But I am hoping it is about 50+ years down the road!  :)

After the funeral, my dad and I picked up Dustyn and we went for a drive to see if we could see any deer.  We saw two bucks, but no luck.  Maybe tomorrow.

It really turned out to be a good day.  

There were so many other things that I wanted to say today, but my brain is blank.  So I guess that is all for a Monday.  We'll see how Tuesday turns out!

I love Alice! :)

You are intelligent, outgoing & stylish. A true girly girl, you love shopping & makeovers. Although you are a generous friend, you can be coy, tricky & very persuasive in order to get your way. You are known to zone out occasionally during conversations, but your friends forgive you because you are understanding, supportive & know how to throw one heck of a party!

Take the Quiz and Share Your Results!

I just might be . . .

(Just ignore the crappiness of this picture, it's called a webcam! Ha ha)

Back to blogging.  

Hopefully you can expect a post from me tomorrow.

Thank you to everyone who sent emails and messages!  You guys are great and I appreciate your love and concern for me.  It's funny how blogging can make you feel so loved.   I have the best friends, EVER!

I am doing well.  I am excited to get back to life . . . and blogging!  

wordle.net

wordle.net

dust+kam 

Taking a break.

A pretty long one.

I am sorry if you feel neglected by me.

I still love you.

I will come back soon and catch up.

Maybe.

I'll miss you.

Miss me.

Need a new purse?

I do!  

Go here for your chance to win at handbagplanet.com

Bembo's Zoo

Very fun and pretty cool.

8 things.

Tagged by Necia!

8 T.V shows I love to watch:
The Office
American Idol
One Tree Hill (except I haven't watched it for-ev-er)
Big Brother
Anything on TLC
Iron Chef America
Good Eats
Food Network Challenge
(now if we only had all those channels!)

8 Favorite Restaurants:
Cafe Rio
Cheesecake Factory
McGrath's Fish House
Steve's Steakhouse
Noodles
Olive Garden
Thaifoon
The Pie

8 things that happened yesterday:
Went out to eat Chinese with my family.
Subbed.
Went to Wal-Mart two or three times.  I think three.
Visited with both sets of my grandparents.
Bought a new Charlie and Lola book and eye liner.
Ate at Subway.
Got the mail.
Ate a pumpkin chocolate chip cookie that Dustyn made.

8 things I am looking forward to:
Adopting.
Going to North Carolina.
Going to Minneapolis.
Getting out of debt.
Getting our yard finished.
Thanksgiving.
FSA Conference next year!  :)
Vacation!

8 things I love about fall:
The smell and chill in the air.
Baking.  Lots of baking.
The beautiful changing scenery.
My angels birthday.
Thanksgiving, Christmas and family gatherings.
Our house is the perfect temperature!
I get motivated to accomplish things again.
CamRee's birthday!!  YAY!  Can you believe she will be 7?

8 things on my wish list:
A baby. And then maybe a little brother or sister.
A new HDTV and Satellite. (The Food Network and TLC, etc.)
A new fridge.
A new couch! (for Dustyn) ;)
A new wardrobe.
New holiday decorations/Everyday decorations for my house.
An iPhone that works in this area!
A new pair of sunglasses.

Have I ever mentioned . . .

How much I LOVE the rain?

 (sadly, I did not take this picture, or any of them really)

How much I LOVE General Conference?

How much I LOVE Eternal Families?

How much I LOVE adoption?

How much I LOVE hope?

Dear holes in my mouth;

I hate you.  I hate the way you catch all my food.  I hate the way you make my gums flip back and forth.  I hate the way you get deeper everyday.  I hate the way you make my head pulse and ache.  I hate that you make brushing my teeth difficult and almost impossible.  I hate that you give me bad breath.  I hate that you make my mouth taste completely disgusting (but not in an infected way).  I hate the way that I can't stop rubbing my tongue over you to make sure I got all the food out, which I haven't.  Did I mention I hate the way that my gums flip back and forth.  It feels wrong and not normal.  At.  All.  I hate that you occasionally taste like blood.  Ew.  You are just gross.

I just don't like you much at all.  Please go away soon.  Please?  Pretty please?  I'll give you a dollar . . . 

Happy Birthday Carrie!

Carrie is one of my BFF's.
If you wanna find out 10 facts about her, you can go here.
She seriously rocks!
She was one of my first roommates at Snow College!

Any you know what?  They are hoping to adopt!  If you know anyone considering adoption, please pass along their information .  They are an amazing couple and will be amazing parents!  For reals!  I love them!

Happy Birthday Carrie!  Lots of Love!!

October

Can you believe it is already October?  Seriously, were did the year go?

I am completely excited that it is fall.  I love fall.  It is my most favorite time of the year.  October marks a lot of major events in our lives.  It's kinda a special month for us, full of emotions, memories, traditions, and fun.

5 years ago this month, Dustyn and I started dating!  It was 5 years ago this month that I found the best husband that there could possibly be for me.  He is amazing and I am completely lucky that I found him!  Can you believe it's been 5 years?  I can not believe that in 3 month I will have been married 5 years!  That is just crazy.  I feel like it was just yesterday.

4 years ago this month, our angel baby, Hannah, came to earth for a short moment. We are thankful for her and for her presence in our lives.  She is such a strength to us and continually turns our thoughts to Heaven and Eternal Life.  She helps us be the people that we need to be.  She gives us strength to keep going.  She reminds us daily of our Eternal plan.  What a blessing.

2 years ago this month, we were officially approved to adopt!  What an amazing journey the past 2+ year have been.  I can not even begin to tell you what I have learned.  I have learned more about myself.  More than I ever thought I wanted to know, but it turns out, I'm not so bad!  I didn't know who I was.  Slowly through trial and error, I am finding myself and the person that I really want to be.

I have learned about Dustyn, about our marriage.  What a miracle to be married to Dustyn for all time and all eternity.  Through all the trials, we sit and wonder what in the world we were suppose to learn.  What good can we take out of our pain and heartache?  Somehow we always find it.  We are together and that is all that matters.  If we never have children here on this earth, I will always be blessed to have Dustyn.  He's all I need on this earth.  I know I have eternity to raise and be with my children.  Now, that doesn't mean that I don't want to have children here, but I am happy to have the eternal family that I have!

Adoption.  Seriously, this is the work of the Lord.  He truly knows what we need and when we need it.  Adoption is such an amazing program.  I mean, something that ends in an eternal family sealed in the Temple for all time and eternity.  Can there be anything more special?  My heart is so full of love for adoption.  My whole and complete heart is in adoption.  I wish I could explain with words how I feel, but I fear there is nothing I can say to explain the feelings of my heart.  Just know, that I feel the love of Christ in adoption.  What an amazing work.

I am not the same person I was two years ago.  I have completely changed through love, heartaches, and experiences.  I will never be the same person I once was and for that I am grateful.

I love October.  I love what it represents to me and my little eternal family.  I love that no matter how sad I am during October, I can find happiness in my Heavenly Father and in his son Jesus Christ.  He is there for me!  He wants me to be happy!  And when he feels we are ready, he will bless us with miracles.  What a loving Heavenly Father we have.  We are so blessed.

I love October!