how i love my baby

even if he isn't a baby anymore.

We finally got his current stats.

weight 24 lbs (50-something %)
height 33 inches (99%)

he's taller than some of the two years olds i know, but he's a skinny, yet stalky boy! :)

please tilt your head to the right.

10 months old

I don't have any official stats, but this is my best guess.
Weight: 22-23 lbs
Length: 30 inches

Random facts about Gage:

• He can crawl! 
• He blows kisses. So cute!
• He can clap when he wants to, but it doesn't happen often.
• He does like to throw his arms in the air and yell "Yay!" 
• He has a favorite blanket that he can not get enough of.
• He is getting better at pulling himself up and walking along the furniture.
• He loves most food, just not green beans, and the turkey/chicken and veggie medleys. 
• It seems like his most favorite jared food is Mac and Cheese. Ew. So gross.
• He loves playing with the food in his mouth. Pushing it around, pushing it through his two little teeth.
• He will drink from a sippy cup, but he can't figure out how to hold it high enough to get anything out of it. 
• He LOVES baths.
• He is a mover and a busy body.
• He has six teeth trying to come in on the top. Four have cut through. His teeth come in soooo slow.
• He loves chewing on his tongue and turning it sideways in his mouth.
• His favorite toys: remote, cell phones, iPods, camcorder, balls, cars, and rings.
• He hates getting his diaper changed or clothes changed. That requires stopping.
• He loves watching people sing. That is his favorite part about church. He giggles.
• He wears 12-18 month old clothes.
• He is the LIGHTEST sleeper ever and we have the squeakiest floors ever. The two do not mix. We never check on him for fear of waking him. Thank goodness for baby monitors.
• He still takes two naps a day, but most of the time, they don't last more than 10-20 minutes. These should be the most productive moments of the day. Instead, I sit silently hoping I don't wake him. :) 
• He goes to sleep at 7:00 p.m. and likes to wake at 5:30 a.m. Sometimes he'll sleep until 6:00-6:30 a.m. but not on the weekends, of course. :)
• He does not like his car seat. At. All. 
• He is a momma's boy. 
• He will not snuggle or let us cradle him or rock him. He never has though. He want to be moving! 
• He will only fall asleep in his crib. And only his crib. 
• I think he gets kissed more than any baby ever has.
• Oh... lets not forget how he loves to eat lotion. As I put it on, he quickly rubs his hands on his belly, gets a little lotion and then goes to licking and sucking on his fingers. Mmm. He gets SO excited the minute I rub my hangs together to warm it up.

That is our Gage in a nutshell. 

I don't think I could love him any more, and then I do. 

He knows he's cute.

He can't quite pull himself all the way up, but he's close. He seems to fall through the slats every time. He doesn't seem to mind the bump to the head.




Once we help him up, he's sure proud. And excited.

I love his after-christmas-special jammies. They make him look so grown up.

will scoot for iPods

nine month photos

He's growing up so fast.

I love my handsome boy.

Oh... and he is getting SIX teeth on top right now. Crazy kid.

I don't think he could get any cuter. And then he does.

It is so hard to just chose a few, so I apologize for the excessive photos. I can not help it.

life changing moments

One year ago today, we had one of those life changing moments.

One year ago. And yet it seems so fresh in my memory. And still I wish I could remember every detail, every word spoken. I'd love to relive that day over and over again.

I remember being so nervous.

I was so nervous I could have thrown up. And I almost did on numerous occasions. My mind was racing at all of the different possibilities. The only details I knew were swirling in my head, and had been for the previous ten days. Korin, boy, April 5th. Korin, boy, April 5th. That is all we knew about Gage's beautiful Korin. And that is all that I could think about.

I wondered what she would look like, what she would think about us, how this whole face-to-face would go. I was freaking out. I do not do too well with social functions and meeting people. I get nervous. What do I do when I get nervous? I talk. I talk a lot. I make bad jokes. You know Chandler Bing? I am Chandler Bing.

And that is exactly what I did.

We drove up in my Tacoma (totally missing it, by the way). As we pulled into the parking lot, I scanned everyones faces and wondered if any of them could be Korin. I wondered if she was watching for us. (She had the advantage here, she had seen pictures of us from our profile). It was a cold and snowy day. Dustyn had taken the day off and we had headed up early. We wanted to make sure that we had plenty of time to get there, and by plenty I mean we had hours to kill.

Good thing I had Aubrey to keep me sane. I just love her. She knew about Korin and about our face-to-face. She kept me calm as I was texting her all morning. She is a life saver.

We went into the LDSFS Office. I had to go to the bathroom. I honestly thought I was going to puke. Dustyn talked to the receptionist and we waited a few minutes. Finally they ushered us into Korin's case worker's office. She told us a little bit about Korin and said that they were running late. As we waited, they tried to shoot the breeze with us. I definitely didn't want small talk at the moment. It was just making more antsy. We sat in silence. That was even worse. I think we were in there 30 minutes or so, but I could be wrong. It seemed like hours.

The secretary beeped in and told P that Korin was here. My heart started racing, gigantic knot in my stomach. I have no idea why I was so nervous. We had met numerous birth mother's before. Why was this one so different? P went and talked to Korin for a moment and then brought her in.

She was beautiful! And so cute! I instantly knew that I knew her. I didn't know how or when, but I knew that I knew her. I can't even explain it. We hugged and she sat down. Her mom and her son came along with her. We talked about her little boy a bit and kind of got acquainted. Of course I was nervous so I was talking fast and saying weird things and making bad jokes that no one got, and tried to ignore. Ha ha. P asked us some questions and we talked. It was awesome. I felt like a dork because I was being one, but I was in awe of Korin and her courage. I watched her with her son and knew I wanted to be a mother like Korin. I wanted to be the kind of mother that she was to her son.

I don't remember everything that was said. I remember a few questions here and there, but I do remember falling in love with Korin and her family. I wish I could get transcripts so I could remember every word that was spoken. (but then again, maybe not. I really was a dork) I am thankful that I can still remember how I felt. Those feelings and emotions are what I don't want to forget.

It was time to leave. We stood and hugged. I think I hugged Korin's mom first. After I hugged Korin, she told us that she wanted us to be her baby's parents. I immediately started sobbing. And I mean sobbing. I hugged her again and cried. Our case workers had stepped out for a minute. We said goodbye and I was walking out of the room when the case workers saw us and instantly were concerned. They left us in the room for 30 seconds alone and suddenly I come out sobbing? They were frantically asking what happened and what was wrong. Our case worker took us and P ran back in to be with Korin and her mom. They were in damage control mode.  Our case worked tried to talk to us. I told him that she had chose us, but I don't think he understood (or maybe he was just being cautious. I think we were the last people he needed to be cautious with! ha ha). I don't even remember what he was saying, but I just remember laughing because I was beaming and he was still in damage control. It was all quite hilarious.

We decided to head on out. As we walked out of the room we were in, we met Korin and her family at the door. Apparently they had just finished talking to P. We said goodbye again and headed to our truck. I was still shocked that this was actually happening to us.

Dustyn I went to IKEA and had a piece of Chocolate Cake to celebrate. We also went to Target and bought Gage's first outfit. As we drove home, I tried and tried to figure out who Korin reminded me of or how I knew her. It was one of the most amazing days I had had, up to that point. The past year has been full of amazing days. More than I ever imagined possible.

You are right, this post if full of gramatical errors. I feel sorry for your eyes and brain. 

gage sans conan's hair

7 months old

20 lbs

29 inches long

six months

a year ago, I couldn't even imagine being a mother.

today, I couldn't imagine my life without him.

it's the stats

two months old.

how is my baby boy already two months old?


craziness, I tell you.


Gage is now: 
12.4 lbs. (52nd Percentile)
23.5 inches (60th Percentile)


he is growing fast.


too fast.


he also had his shots today.
poor kid.


i wasn't sure he knew how to cry until today. sad, sad, sad. you can tell that is legs are so sore. it makes me sad.

our two month photo shoot?

went about like this:

luckily we still got plenty of cute pictures.

more to come (once dustyn edits them)

but today, g's full of smiles.

silly boy.